Monday, June 06, 2005

verbal emissions

Once again my car has me thinking. A dangerous thing for sure. I took her in for emissions inspection today. She passed with flying colors. She was far, far below the percentage that she needed to be below in order to pass. I think that has to do with the fact that she is a pretty environmentally sound car being a Nissan sedan. I also think it helps that I only fill her up with 93 octane gasoline. Or, at least I like to think I am helping the environment that way.

I wonder what grade we would all get if we did a yearly "verbal emissions" test. We would be strapped up to a machine that would download from our brain all the stuff that has spewed out of our mouth in the last year. Every hurtful comment. Every obnoxious joke. Every compliment and encouraging word. I wonder if they would consider our verbal emissions "toxic pollution."

It would be interesting if they balanced the good with the bad and gave you a percentage. If you were below a certain percent of negativity, you pass. But if not, you are deemed generally toxic to humanity and especially to the Kingdom of God. The penalty would be that you couldn't speak for the next 3 months. I wonder what a quiet world we might live in. I might need to find a new job. After all, being a "pastor-type-person" does require a certain amount of talking and preaching. I am sure my toxicity would far surpass the yearly allowance.

Well, the good news is that it is only our cars that are tested. And my car did so well that it doesn't have to come back for a two years. I wish I could say the same of my mouth.


At 3:23 PM, Blogger Jenn said...

This is a good post Mark. I find that when I recognize the toxic things that come out of my mouth the hardest thing is actually saying "I am sorry" to the person who I offended or upset by them. I know it doesn't fit your analogy but what a world it would be if instead of not talking for 3 months, we actually admitted to those we hurt that we indeed say something hurtful and then appologize.

At 1:24 PM, Blogger brendar said...

I have a problem with "nocturnal verbal emissions". I have been told by several people that I say the most appalling things in my sleep.

At 2:08 PM, Blogger Mark said...

Looks like you have been spending some time with Rebecca. :)

At 2:10 PM, Blogger Mark said...

You say the most appalling things when you are awake. I can't imagine they are any worse when you sleep. :)

At 3:42 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is your car a 4 cylinder? I wouldn't run that high octane in it if is. Probably not even in a 6. Probably 89.

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