new found prayer

He has called me out. He has opened my eyes and convicted my heart. I have come to the realization these past few days that what I am attempting to do here at Horizon cannot be done if I stay the same. God has given me a task too large for my present spiritual dependency and my present level of intimacy with God. I know this now and see that I need more. I need more of God in my day. It has to happen. There is no other way. There is either more God or more failure. Those are my only options.

I have gone back into some books and my covenant group manuals to revisit the spiritual disciplines, especially prayer. I am embarking on a new adventure in my prayer life. I am attempting to carve out more space for the presence of God in my daily life. And as I carve this space out my plan is to fill it with my listening ear rather than my words of intercession.

I am going to do as Frank Laubach did and experiment with prayer. I am going to take the step of faith that assumes prayer is powerful and effective. I am going to believe that prayer will change me and help me know the voice of my Father if I will submit to Him. I long to know Him but haven't been connecting with Him lately. Its been dry.

So I will follow the call. God is calling me to depth. And so I will take the plunge. In a way I have never attempted before, I plan on submitting my schedule and my attention to the will of the Father. I will practice the Jesus prayer, the centering prayer, Lectio Divina, listening, and even journaling. These are my experimental tools. The goal is to come before the Father each day with consistent times of silence. The goal is to taste and see that the Lord is good and to re-learn the voice of my Shepherd.

I have forgotten His touch. I am no longer satisfied with my on-again, off-again dating relationship with Him. I need marriage. I need depth. I need intimacy that I can only find in the deeper places of my soul and His. And so I set out in my little canoe to cross the ocean of prayer. I hope to learn how to pray along the way. I also hope that my life will be transformed in a way I never thought possible. I hope to become a disciple....all over again.