top ten fragrant girls

I was talking with Lisa Murphy, assistant director of Collins hall, tonight and we were discussing the freshman girls that I thought were smelly. I was working the desk in Collins tonight so we sat there and picked out some girls that would make my top ten list.

I am thinking about making a bulletin board in the lobby of Collins in order to display my top ten list. My job, as an office assistant, is to sit at the desk and decide if:
1. there is "a stinkyness" about the girl
2. the girl is stinky
3. the girl is stumbly
4. the girl is somber

Of course there is an increasing degree of smell as I move from level 1 to level 4. As the top ten list is formed, the top three will be considered the bronze, silver and gold medal winners. All the names will be posted on the board in the lobby and the medal winners will have their picture and bio posted up there.

My first few offerings for tonight are three stand out girls. They are:
Poopy Pants
Drinks Alot
Cry Baby

Aside-o Lamb just told me Cry's last name. I know the others because they have received gifts at the front desk before. I must say that Poopy is tough competition. She definitely rates a "somber". Drinks probably rates a stumble and Cry is both stinky and stumbles. I will call her, "Really stinken stumbly!" Maybe that is the equivalent of a 3 and 1/2.

So these are the first Collins girls to make the list. As the list grows to ten, their odor will fully rank and then they make a bulletin board. This is my obligation....no, my DUTY as the only showered staff working in Collins Hall.